The law of ringtones

Ringtones seem to work off an x² formula. x is the importance of the person, and x = 0 means the person is neither particular important or particularly unimportant.
It's worthwhile noting, however, that the ringtone of x < 0 is more likely to be some kind of pop music, whereas the for x > 0 it's more likely to be one that's built into the phone.